Thursday, November 13, 2008

Strange Math

While waiting in line at the grocery store I was looking at the magazine covers. I know I shouldn't do that, I REALLY shouldn't. Some of the stuff that these people write, I just can't believe that anyone would read this garbage. Then again, people read my blog so...

One of the headings made me burst out laughing. Nothing strange about that right? I'm just standing there, quietly waiting and suddenly start laughing like a psych patient responding to internal stimuli. The woman behind me grabbed her children and headed to a different line.

Seriously, the heading that I read was on Self magazine. I'll give them a link and hope that they laugh instead of litigate. The heading read, "Look 100% sexier in 7 minutes". How the hell do you measure that? Seriously, what kind of math is involved to figure this out? I didn't go to college so maybe I missed the course on quantifying sexiness.

Now, I'm sure that I will get some criticism for this. There are women who take this subject very seriously. They have charts and graphs and Venn Diagrams with complex formulas for determining the exponent of their sexiness over a period of time.

For me, I am worried about being too sexy. I don't think I need the full 100% increase in sexiness. I've decided to take a more subtle approach and spend 1.75 minutes to look 25% sexier. Yeah, I think that's all I need. Besides, I'm all about taking Baby steps.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Renegade



Rumor has it that the Secret Service as chosen a code name for our new President elect, "Renegade".

Is he going to ride to The White House on a sweet motorcycle like Lorenzo Lamas?

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Imagine

Bloggers Unite
Often times we get caught up in the stability and security of our own lives and it's hard for us to imagine that life is not the same way for all people.

Imagine if you suddenly had to leave your country because violence broke out.

Imagine having to evacuate and having no place to call home.

Where would you sleep?

What would you eat?

What if you became sick?

What about your children?

It's hard to Imagine but life is just like this for millions of refugees around the world.

Imagine if there was something you could do to help.

There is.
With your help there is hope.
Take a few minutes right now to visit these websites:
www.refugees.org and www.womenscommission.org

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Blind Luck

Have you ever wondered how people manage to get through life in one piece?

I saw the most amazing thing yesterday. I was driving in the right hand lane, about to make a right turn when this guy comes flying from the left lane to cut me off. There's three lanes here and I am far from being the only car on the road.

I probably would have hit him had it not been for the screeching tires of the other drivers he narrowly avoided. I heard cuss words that would make a sailor blush. Some of them even came from outside of my truck.

Then, as he makes the right turn, he doesn't yield but instead goes to the far left lane. Again, he cuts off three lanes of traffic. Horns are honking, tires are screeching, fingers are flying and new profanities are being invented.

At this point, I lose sight of this genius because I actually have to wait for an opening in the traffic to make my turn. Sometimes, stupidity does the work of bravery and, at this moment, I am neither brave nor stupid.

I finally make my turn and immediately merge into the left lane to make a left turn. No surprise but guess who I see zip from the far right lane to cut me off in the left turn lane? Yep, the same genius.

At this point, I notice something astonishing. The car he is driving isn't new. It's NOT NEW! This car doesn't have a sngle scratch or dent on it and it's four years old. With the way this guy drives, this car should look like it just came from a demolition derby.

I have to follow this guy and ask him for the lottery numbers. There's no way this is driving skill, it has to be blind luck.